The UNKAGED™ Woman Podcast with Brig Johnson, APN, MSNA. Where high-achieving Black & Brown women reclaim themselves.

What if the voice you have been calling your inner critic is actually trying to protect you?

In this episode, Brig introduces the idea of your “inner cutie,” the part of you that gets loud when you are about to do something new, uncomfortable, or important. That voice may sound like fear, hesitation, or self-doubt, but Brig encourages you to stop treating it like the enemy.

Instead of trying to silence that voice, she shows you how to get curious about it. What is it afraid of? What is it trying to protect you from? What information is it giving you?

Brig also shares from her own experience and explains how listening to this part of yourself can help you build trust with yourself, make clearer decisions, and move forward without waiting for fear to disappear.

WHAT YOU’LL LEARN

• How to recognize the difference between your inner critic and your inner cutie
• Why self-doubt may be information, not proof that you should stop
• How to question negative self-talk instead of automatically believing it
• Why listening to your inner voice can strengthen self-trust
• How to work with fear instead of fighting against it

WHY THIS MATTERS

Many of us have learned to push down fear, ignore doubt, and force ourselves forward. But Brig offers another way.

The feelings you are trying to get rid of may be trying to tell you something. When you slow down, listen, and respond with curiosity instead of judgment, you can make decisions from a place of awareness instead of fear.

TAKE ACTION

The next time self-doubt shows up, pause before trying to silence it.

Ask yourself: What is this part of me trying to tell me? What is she afraid will happen? What does she need to feel safe enough for me to move forward?

You do not have to let fear make the decision, but you also do not have to fight yourself to grow.

For a clearer look at the patterns shaping your choices, take the free Kages Self-Assessment and discover what may be keeping you stuck.

 

STAY CONNECTED —

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In this episode, Brig speaks to the high-achieving Black woman who has worked hard, planted faithfully, and built so much, but still feels guilty slowing down long enough to receive the harvest.

If rest feels like falling behind, or receiving feels harder than doing, this conversation will hit home. Brig breaks down the old thoughts that keep you proving, producing, and pushing, even when you have already done the work. She challenges you to notice when you are still operating in planting mode, even though life may be inviting you into a season of harvest.

What You'll Learn

• Recognize when you are always planting but never allowing yourself to harvest
• Understand why receiving may feel uncomfortable, even when you have earned what is coming to you
• Identify the thoughts that keep you overworking, overgiving, and under-receiving
• Learn how to stop treating every season like it requires more striving
• Practice celebrating your wins without guilt, apology, or the need to immediately move on to the next thing

Why This Hits So Hard

So many women have been taught to measure their value by how much they can carry. That conditioning can make rest feel unsafe, success feel temporary, and receiving feel undeserved.

This episode challenges that pattern. Brig reminds you that you are not failing because you need rest. You are not lazy because you want to enjoy what you have built. And you do not have to keep planting just because planting is what you know.

Take Action

Ask yourself: Am I in a planting season, or am I in a harvest season?

Then pause long enough to name what your work has already produced. Receive the compliment. Take the break. Let the win count. Let yourself experience the peace and joy you keep working toward.

To take a closer look at what may be driving your pattern of overworking and under-receiving, take the free Kages Self-Assessment and discover which old beliefs may be keeping you from fully receiving your success.

STAY CONNECTED —

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It's time to unpack the pictures in your head that shape your reality, because they often aren't the truth. In this episode, Brig breaks down the mental images we create about how life is "supposed" to be, and how these pictures can lead to unnecessary frustration and pain. Join in as she shares a personal story about a flat tire that showed her a massive lesson about expectations and reality. You'll learn how these constructs can hold you back, and how recognizing them can set you free.

What You'll Learn

• Identify the difference between reality and the pictures in your head that rule your life
• Understand how these mental images are formed and the impact they have on your emotions
• Explore the roots of your expectations and question their validity
• Discover practical steps to dissolve the emotional charge around unmet expectations
• Learn how to shift your perspective from frustration to acceptance, freeing up energy for what truly matters

Why It Matters

We often find ourselves moving through life with rigid expectations that lead to disappointment. By recognizing that these pictures are constructs rather than truths, we can stop arguing with reality and start embracing it. This shift allows for greater peace and the ability to actually enjoy our days, instead of just getting by. 

Take Action

When you feel disappointment or frustration, pause and ask yourself: What did I think was supposed to happen here? Then, challenge that picture: Is this based on something real, or is it a story I've absorbed over time? This simple practice can help you get your focus back on what actually matters.

 

RESOURCE —

Then take the free Kages Self-Assessment and find out which kage has been keeping you stuck.

 

STAY CONNECTED —

Website | Instagram | Facebook

Queen, you've been giving wife-level loyalty on a girlfriend-level container — and it's time to name that pattern without shame.

In this episode, I'm getting into something tricky but necessary: the gap between what you're giving in a relationship and what's actually been established. This isn't about weakness, desperation, or low self-esteem. It's a program — and once you can see it clearly, you get to choose something different.

What You'll Learn

• Understand the difference between "wife work" and "girlfriend salary" — and why that gap deserves to be named
• Recognize the real cost of over-giving: your time, your self-trust, your standards, and the version of you with her own dreams
• Trace where this programming comes from — childhood, love songs, church messaging, and the women in our families we admired most
• Unpack the most dangerous belief hiding underneath it all: if he leaves, it's because you didn't give enough
• Learn why a man who only stays when you're over-giving wasn't staying — he was being comfortable
• Discover the most important question in the whole episode: are you giving from love, or from fear?

Why It Matters

We were taught that the ring was the reward — that if we gave enough, waited long enough, loved hard enough, it would all be worth it. But the reward was never the ring. It's respect, reciprocity, and a relationship where both people show up because they want to, not because one person has been auditioning for a position the other person never offered.

You were never the problem. You were running a program that was never designed to serve you. Society designed it to serve everyone else — and now you get to choose something different.

Take Action

Before you give at wife level, define the container. Ask yourself: what's actually been established here? And what's driving this — love, or obligation?

Then take the free Kages Self-Assessment and find out which program has been running your relationships:
👉🏾 assessment.brigjohnson.com

Visit my website: brigjohnson.com

Queen, the question you've been asking after the betrayal isn't the one that will actually give you peace.

If you've ever been blindsided by someone you trusted, this episode is for you. Grab your tea, find a quiet space, and let's talk — as friends, as women who've been there. Because there's something we do after we've been hurt that feels like healing but isn't. And today I want to give you the one question that actually gets you to the other side.

What You'll Learn

• Understand why your brain goes into detective mode after betrayal — and why it's not torturing you, it's trying to protect you
• See why the answer you're looking for was never in the evidence, no matter how long you search for it
• Discover the real question underneath the question — the one that actually has an answer you can build on
• Recognize the difference between performing okay and actually being strong — and what it costs you to hold it all together when you're not
• Learn why self-trust isn't a decision you make once, but a practice you build through real reps over time

Why It Matters

We spend months — sometimes years — going back through every conversation, every red flag, every moment we should have seen coming. But here's what I've learned at 61: some things just don't make sense, and the person who hurt you may not even understand why they did it. No amount of investigation is going to give you that answer.

The security you've been looking for was never in them. It was always in you. The woman who trusts herself to handle whatever comes doesn't need to run an investigation anymore. She's free to love fully — not from fear, but from knowing she's got herself no matter what.

Doing it soft is how you do it strong.

Take Action

Sit with this question: Can I trust myself to take care of me, no matter what someone else does?

And find out which Kage has been making it hard to trust yourself — take the free Kages Self-Assessment, five minutes, completely free: 👉🏾 assessment.brigjohnson.com

Visit my website: brigjohnson.com

Queen, your decision is the sentence. Everything else is just a footnote — and it's time to stop leading with the footnote.

In this episode, I'm getting into something I caught myself doing in real time: building a full legal brief for a woman I'd met once, just to say no. Big decisions, small transactions — the pattern runs everywhere. And today we're going to name it, trace it to its roots, and start dismantling it.

What You'll Learn

• Recognize the footnote pattern — why we bury our decisions at the end of a long explanation instead of leading with them
• Understand the real cost of over-explaining: how it gives others ammunition to negotiate with your reasons and erodes your own self-trust over time
• Trace the roots of this programming — from survival on the plantation, through Jim Crow, the angry Black woman trope, the family table, and the doctor's office — and why the footnote was once a safety net
• See why knowing the pattern isn't enough — and why this is nervous system and identity level work, not a communication tip
• Practice three concrete reps you can start today: decide cold, lead with the decision, and let the silence breathe

Why It Matters

You didn't learn to over-explain because you're insecure. You learned it because in the rooms your mothers, grandmothers, and great-grandmothers walked into, leading with the decision wasn't safe. That programming got passed down — not in a conversation, but in your nervous system. The footnote kept somebody safe. The footnote got somebody home. But the rooms have changed, and you get to put it down now.

The silence after your decision is not a problem to fix. The silence is where your authority lives.

Take Action

Notice every time you don't lead with the decision. Notice the pull to justify, to soften, to make it pretty. That's the cage talking — and what you can't see runs you.

Then take the free KAGES Self-Assessment — five minutes, completely free — and find out exactly which survival program has been writing footnotes for decisions that never needed them: 👉🏾 assessment.brigjohnson.com

Visit my website: brigjohnson.com

Queen, you were never the problem. You were just given a tool that wasn't built for you — and then blamed when it didn't fit.

In this episode, I want to introduce you to Bob. Bob is fine. Bob starts every attempt at growth from baseline — neutral, stable, rested, regulated. You? You start already carrying. And that changes everything. This is the conversation bro self-help has never been willing to have.

What You'll Learn

• Meet Bob — and finally understand why the starting line was never equal and what that actually means for your goals
• Identify the real loads you've been carrying that no productivity system ever accounted for: hyper vigilance, allostatic stress, emotional labor, generational history, and more
• Understand the Capacity Gap — why pushing harder on an overloaded nervous system doesn't build capacity, it depletes it further
• See the three gaps keeping high-achieving women spinning: the Capacity Gap, the Authority Gap, and the Belief Gap
• Learn why the goal was never to become more disciplined — and what to aim for instead
• Discover the difference between resting and actually recovering — and why it matters for your next attempt

Why It Matters

Every program you've ever tried was an app running on an outdated operating system. The OS was installed for survival in a world that no longer exists — and the apps keep crashing. It was never your discipline. It was never your mindset. It was never you. You just ran out of capacity that was never replenished, because you started so far behind the start line Bob never even knew existed. This ends now.

Take Action

Next time you quit something, don't ask what's wrong with me. Ask: what was I carrying that I never accounted for?

Then take the free CAGES Self-Assessment — it takes five minutes and will show you exactly which of the 5 survival programs has been quietly running your life: 👉🏾 assessment.brigjohnson.com

Have a topic you want me to cover? Reach out: brig@brigjohnson.com

Visit my website: brigjohnson.com

Queen, you didn't give up — you just stopped seeing yourself as the one who gets to create.

In this episode, I'm getting into something that almost slipped past me completely — because it doesn't look like giving up. It looks like being responsible. Mature. Realistic. But here's the truth: at some point, protection becomes a prison. And if you've been living in the middle ground — no big dreams, no big risks, no big disappointments — this episode is for you.

What You'll Learn

• Recognize the four ways women respond to disappointment — and identify the sneakiest one: the woman who looks like she recovered but never really got back in the game
• Understand why you stopped dreaming — and why the dream was never actually the problem
• See the critical difference between the outcome and the desire, and why lumping them together is keeping you stuck
• Discover what a Loyalty Contract is and how to use it to protect yourself when things get hard — without shutting down
• Learn the four steps to rebuild your relationship with wanting, dreaming, and creating again

Why It Matters

The quiet cost of not dreaming isn't just personal. Every person who needed you fully — your clients, your kids, your community — got the version of you that was playing it safe. The world was never designed for us to see ourselves as creators and builders. So when disappointment hits, we don't just lose the round — we lose our sense of ourselves as someone who gets to be in the game at all. This episode is about getting that back.

You didn't get too old for the dream. You just stopped believing you were the one who could make it real. And that is a completely different problem — with a completely different solution.

Take Action

Start with one small thing. One thing you stopped doing because it made you want something. Email me or DM me and tell me what it is.

• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/johnsonbrig

Find out which cage has been keeping you in the middle ground — take the free Kage Assessment (just 5 minutes): 👉🏾 assessment.brigjohnson.com

Visit my website: brigjohnson.com

Queen, you've been a foreigner in your own life for long enough — and it's time to come home.

After a real, unfiltered season away, I'm back. In this episode, I'm pulling back the curtain on what actually happened: the financial reality of my coaching business, the decision to return to anesthesia, the inner battle I fought for six months, and the hard-won clarity that came out of it all. This isn't just a comeback — it's a full OS upgrade.

What You'll Learn

• Understand why silencing your inner critic doesn't work — and what to do instead: listen with respect
• Recognize how fear compounds and shrinks your energy, making it even harder to move forward
• See the difference between "putting your feelings in a corner" and actually processing them
• Discover what the Unkaged Method really is — not a program, but an operating system upgrade for your life
• Identify the 5 survival programs most high-achieving women are running without knowing it: Cultural Program, Armor of Achievement, Giving Until Gone, Energy Depletion, and Silencing the Self

Why It Matters

The systems were never going to protect us — and the current political climate is making that clearer than ever. But what's also clearer is this: we have tools available now that didn't exist in 1930, or the 50s, or the 60s. We can build our own. We can serve our own. But to do that, we have to be able to lead ourselves — and that means getting out of your own way, upgrading the OS, and becoming truly Unkaged.

I spent nine months not just teaching this work, but living it. I'm back clearer, stronger, and with more to say than ever.

Take Action

Find out which of the 5 survival programs has been running your life — take my free Kage Assessment (just 5 minutes):

👉🏾 assessment.brigjohnson.com

Visit my website: brigjohnson.com

Queen, let's talk about the elephant in the room: that exhausting dance you're doing in your relationship where you're solving his problems before he even names them, managing his emotions while yours get pushed aside, and wondering why love feels like a second job. If you're tired of performing for love instead of receiving it, this episode is your wake-up call.

It's time to stop auditioning for partnership and start demanding the real thing. Because what society calls "devotion" is actually just patriarchy in a hoodie—and your nervous system is paying the price.

What You'll Learn

• Discover how "overfunctioning" elevates cortisol and creates adrenal fatigue in your body

• Recognize performance partnership vs. true partnership—and why one is just patriarchy in disguise

• Transform your understanding of safety: why regulating his emotions will never regulate yours

• Notice how overfunctioning prevents your partner from developing emotional accountability

• Shift from emotional babysitting to creating space for genuine co-regulation

Why It Matters

High-achieving Black women are conditioned to carry everyone's emotional weight—and it's literally breaking down our bodies. This pattern of self-abandonment doesn't just show up in romantic relationships; it's how we operate with bosses, children, and friends. Breaking free from performance partnership is about reclaiming your worth, your energy, and your right to be fully supported instead of always being the one doing the supporting.

Take Action

Take my free quiz to discover how your nervous system and survival patterns may be blocking your clarity:

👉🏾 brigjohnson.com/stress-quiz 

 

RESOURCES

• Join my Newsletter, Unlearn and Unleash
• Share Your Takeaways With Me at brig@brigjohnson.com
• Stress Quiz